Monday, August 23, 2010

I need some relationship advice. I sort of started flirting online with someone and I am married, my husband?

found out about it and asked me to stop. I tried to stop for like a day but Ive been really depressed and it was the only thing making me feel good at the time. Its only been going on for a couple of weeks. We just started marriage counseling and I feel like a complete loser. I never physically cheated on him but he says this is worse than that . He has been reading everything that I have been saying. I finally feel like I can stop. Its been like an escape for me but I realize there is no way that it would ever work out. I am afraid I may have ruined everything good that my husband and I ever had. He wasnt giving me the emotional input that I needed and we were so distant and had so many other problems going on in our lives that is why I felt the need to find the emotional stuff elsewhere. Is there any hope for our relationship. I am so ashamed of myself because I have been physically cheated on in the past and know how it feels, yet I made him feel the same way. What can I doI need some relationship advice. I sort of started flirting online with someone and I am married, my husband?
Well you just have to stop and put your energy into your marriage. Give counseling a chance and give your husband a chance to make you happy again.I need some relationship advice. I sort of started flirting online with someone and I am married, my husband?
you feel like what you are
You can stop. You became addicted to the feeling you got from someone paying extra attention to you. Marriages do not stay new forever. If you can get that honeymoon feeling somewhere else...well...it's probably easy to get addicted to. Put the time you spent cheating online into your marriage and you will likely rekindle things with your husband. Consider getting rid of the internet.
afraid these kinds of things only go away over time, same dang slow time it takes for a fella like me wishing someone loved me and felt i was attractive, time works in funny ways,, so,, as they say in whoopie goldbergs movie,, GIVE IT TO GOD KRISPIE, GIVE IT TO GOD,,.http://www.interviewwithgod.com
Wow! this somewhat bad... What u need to do is be staright out with your husband and tell him this happened because he was neglecting you. I know what umean..... and what u are feeling at this time.... but us women also need to be taken care of by our husbands and not be neglected... What do men do when their wives dont put out? they get mad and sometimes they look somewhere else. they do what ever it takes to get by and satisfy themselves, but when we women do something similar it turns into this big deal and we are called hores and what ever.. Maybe what u did wasnt right but he needs to understand he cannot neglect his wife. We are like flowers we need sun and water to survive.
i would say that now you are even so get over it and move on unless your relationship only exist if there is drama why else would you be keeping the pass current.
Flirting can start out harmless but develop into more without you intending it to that is why you should not do it at all. What you did was cheat EMOTIONALLY and I am going through the same thing but I was on the receiving end. You must earn his trust back and both of you must communicate!!!
Stop all communication.Start being totally honest with your husband.
Keep going to counseling and hopefully he will be able to see in what ways he might have contributed to the problem. But for now, all you can do is apologize, and make sure it doesn't happen again. It takes time to rebuild trust so you are going to have to be patient.





And although he might feel bad about what you've done it isn't the same as having a physical relationship with someone. It isn't good of course, but you shouldn't feel like a complete loser. We're all human. We all make mistakes, including your husband. The only thing we can do is try to rectify what we've done, and make sure it doesn't happen again.
tell your marriage counceler what you just wrote in front of your husband because it sounds like your hubby was being neglectful somwhere and if it doesnt get resolved you might continue to seek compfort elsewhere so explain it all to your marriage counceler.


good luck and dont be to hard on yourself and dont let him play your guilt against you. no body's perfect.
wow you are bad!
Stick with going to counselling. He found out about it and asked you to stop. He didn't find out about it and say, ';I want a divorce now!'; so chances are that this is totally fixable. You'll probably have to comply with a lot of his needs to get over it, but isn't it worth it? I understand--you weren't getting what you needed emotionally so you looked elsewhere. I think you felt the flirting was totally harmless, and you're probably right. Just keep up with the counseling, explain the situation to your counselor, and maybe he/she has some suggestions. Like maybe your husband doesn't need to read all of your online transmissions with this person. That might just make things worse! Follow whatever direction the counselor gives you.
easier said than done, but just stop going to the site where he is. i kinda did the same ONE time and felt so nasty afterwords. however, this guy didn't do much talking, but rather something else. i felt sooooo bad cuz i sat there and watched him. and i don't think i ever went to that site again. for me, it was more of a ';just to check it out'; thing, not anything to do with looking for another man as i am happily married. i felt as tho i had cheated in a way, but knew that i didn't. i had actually gotten scared cuz after he done wat he did, he went crazy saying he knew i was a man watching him. i felt like he was gonna find a way to track me down. it took for ever for me to fall asleep at night cuz of the fear that he was coming after me. what my story boils down to is, leave well enough alone cuz there are crazy computer freaks out there. you NEVER know who you are talking to or wat they may do. if you make them mad, they may not come after you, but rather someone in your family...


however, the best thing for you to do is pray. ask GOD to help guide you through this matter and have trust in him. we are only human and are tempted in sooo many ways. GOD said ask and you will recieve, knock and it will be opened.. :%26gt;)
Give it to God, pray about it

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