I need advice on what to do about my husband and son please and thank you?

My son will be 18 next month and he is my husband's step son My husband has always done his best to support him recently my son dropped out of school and has gotten into trouble he can't get and Identification card or Drivers License until he pays over $700.00 dollars in fines I am not working at the time we have an infant so my husbands supports us at this time, My husband told my son to go back to school or find a way to pay his fine and my son got angry and threw a tantrum he then told police my husband beat him which the police didn't believe it my husband wants him out when he's 18 but my son has no where else to go my husband wants an apology and until he gets one he's not going to help him out with anything and wants him gone, my son refuses to apologize and he can't work with Identification we aren't going to pay his fines and he says he can't go to school without bus fare and my husband isn't going to help him with that either. I am in a bad situation here I love my son and I know he has done wrong things I haven't the heart to kick him out and my husband is a great man besides are disagreement on this issue. I don't know what to do I feel like this could damage my relationship with both my son and husband. Is my husband being unreasonable or is he right. My husband is also upset because my son never turns off his t.v or helps around the house. I have talked to my son and he tells me if I can't help him with bus fare he can't go to school he always has money for other things and my husband tells me that also I am lost and hurt. Please any advice is greatly appreciated


41 minutes ago - 4 days left to answer.





my son has issues with my husband because he feels he's not his father and shouldn't tell him anything, I am not working the only money I have is my husbands and he won't help untill my son apoligizesI need advice on what to do about my husband and son please and thank you?
Listen to your husband. It is time for some tough love for your son. If he has money to do other things he can figure out how to get to school. Does he have feet? if so he can walk to school Make him do extra chores around the house to pay back his fines. Wash the car(s), clean the garage, etc. This should be in addition to whatever duties he should be doing such as keeping his room clean, helping keep the kitchen clean, laundry, etc. He should be credited at whatever the minimum wage in your community is for menial labor. It's time for you to stand up and be a mother, not a friend.I need advice on what to do about my husband and son please and thank you?
I sympathise with your husband. Why can't the boy's father help here? Isn't he paying any Child Support? Your selfish son should be told, by YOU, that your husband has supported him for years when he was under no obligation to do so and that if he thinks he can do better elsewhere he is free to go, but if he wants to stay there he has to be pleasant and cooperative. Or he can ask his father for money. Anyway you just have a month to go and you can kick him out.
You need to stop babying your son and treat him like the ADULT he's about to be. Tell him to go out and get a job. He got himself into that situation and he needs to get himself out of it.





His mommy and her husband aren't always going to be there for him when something goes wrong. I'm a girl and I got my first job when I was 16, so he can't complain.





or tell him to stop being a b*tch and say he's sorry and really mean it so that he can get his ID and get a job to pay back his step dad.





He's trying to make you think that your husband doesn't like him so that you will feel bad for him.





but either way HE has to do something. Make HIM work for what HE did.
Tell him to apologize, Its one simple thing and telling the cops that is pretty big. If they did believe him your husband could've been in ALOT of trouble. He needs to apologize and be on house arrest from you guys if he cannot pay for them himself then he needs to work his way out of them. He can work for you guys and / or friends of yours etc to make up for the money... He may be 18 but when you live in a house you HAVE to follow the house owners rules. Period.





Your husband is right to be mad, kicking him out is harsh but your son needs to respect him. He said he would help him aslong as he apologized... Thats more than just fair... Talk to your son because it is fair and he can have kick him out. And he can also have him put in juvie now if he doesn't listen to him...
I definitely understand your situation because I'm dealing with a similar one. I know he's your child and you can't bear to put him out on the street, but It's time to show him tough love. This is more serious than what you think, its time for him to not only learn the importance of education, but responsibility, the value of a dollar, respect, and maturity. I'm a firm believer in ';nipping things in the bud'; at an early age, always remember this needs to be acted upon rather sooner than later. Just the fact that your husband takes care of you the way he does is enough right there for your son to give him the up most respect. If you ask me he has it pretty easy! Going to school, doing a few chores, maturing, is that really too much to ask for? Who cares if It'll be a burden on your son %26amp; your relationship, remember in the end when he does become a MAN, not only will he appreciate momma %26amp; dad, but he'll understand why you did that, he be able to teach his son these things at an early age, and that right there is enough for you to say enough is enough. I hope you find your answer. Time heals all wounds, and prayer changes things!
Your husband is right. Sometimes, being a parent means making a child learn from his own mistakes. If he's 17 and owes over $700 in fines, his behind should be out there earning a paycheck. I started working when I turned 16 and worked through high school. There's no reason he can't do the same.





What I would suggest though is that you encourage your husband and your son to spend a whole weekend together - whether that be going camping or somewhere where it's just the two of them with no distractions and see if they can work out their differences and come to an understanding. If nothing else, let them go to a local motel or something and as awkward as it may seem, have them share a room.





But if I was in your husband's position, I would take the same stand. If he's going to live there when he turns 18 he needs to be working and paying at least a bill or two. He's almost an adult and he needs to start acting like one. if he doesn't have a place to go, it's because he is relying on you to bail him out. He's wanting to take advantage of you and not be a real man. Sometimes momma birds have to push their babies out of the nest into the real world to teach them to fly!