About to move in with boyfriend but cant stop thinking about my ex husband. i need your help and advice?

was with my husband 7 years until last year when i left. ive left him a few times before because so many arguments, no loving/caring. no sex life. and sometimes the arguments would escolate into me getting shoved or pushed (he didnt hit me though). we both did things wrong and it seemed like we couldnt get over causing each other so much pain. i always thought we would have a family etc.





i met him when i was 21, i am now 28 and have now met someone else. like me he is an artist and i am also going to university on monday to make something of my life. i have been very happy but suddenly i cant seem to believe that i will never be with my ex husband again. we always used to get back together but this time i have held out and i feel sad.





i love my new partner and we have been together almost a year now and this weekend i am moving in with him. i keep thinking that the dayi move in will really be the end of my marriage. i have been so excited but suddenly the loss of my marriage has hit me and i am in tears right now. i really need your help.





do i get back with my husband and try once again to make it work or should i try and make a new life with my new partner? which ever one i choose will be very painful. why do i feel this way? can you help?





louise x


About to move in with boyfriend but cant stop thinking about my ex husband. i need your help and advice?
well for one you r starting your life with a new person all over again and that is scary not knowing what he is like when you start living with him . I think the reason y u r feeling this way because for the last 7 years all u knew is ur ex husband. And for you to start this all over again it is hard but i can tell u that u gave him enough time to try and work it out but it did not happen. shoving and pushing leads to hitting hitting leads to badly beating u need to stop think about ur PAST because it will cause you ur future. Hope things work out all the best About to move in with boyfriend but cant stop thinking about my ex husband. i need your help and advice?
sweetie that's why they call them ex's you' have to search your heart and soul for this one I go with your new lover but that's just me hope it works out with you etheir way
For one relax. Just because something new is beginning doesn't mean the other is being lost.


I am soo happy for you! I'm sure your happy too!


It's normal to think of past relationships when your making a big move in the current relationship. You may miss your husband because of what you have shared and that you know him. Perhaps he's alot better now...Either way don't overreact to what you feel and over analyze. Just try to do what makes you happy. But remember that you and your husband didn't get a divorce because you were going to keel over with joy from each other and those wonderful warm feelings and understanding. It's not like your giing a part of yourself to this new BF, just that your giving him what you can.


I'm sure he understands that the best he can. So don't feel bad for what you feel.


My advice would be to take a step back and write a list why I want either one and decide which one isn't costly to your mental health and sanity. Not to mention health itself.


You don't have to choose. Is your bf making you? If that's the case then I'd tell him that you can't just evaporate one second of your life and how you lived it let alone 7 years and all that happened and he's being an *** for expecting that.


Again I don't know everything about it all or the depth. Only you can decide. I just don't understand why it's and ulitmatum.


Good Luck! Hope your happy either way though!!!
What you're experiencing is close to a bereavement. I don't think you should get back with your husband - from what you have said, it seemed that it was a vicious circle. However, you are now embarking on a big change in your life, and it's only natural that you are feeling this way.





You were married for 7 years - and that's no mean feat. The fact that you are drawing a line under this now, by moving in with your man, is testament to your strength.





I would move on with your new partner and try to make this work. Why would you want to go back to a relationship that was filled with pain.





Good luck in whatever you decide to do.
Its completly understandable the emotions you are feeling at the mo, change is a hugh thing for all of us and hard to move with at first but its about development and future happiness, your new guy sounds lovely and NORMAL please dont go back to your ex as it sounds as though you were living off the extreme highs and lows of that experiene, im sure you had good times between but its not healthy and i would hate to think that you would go back and some day find yourself back her telling people that you wish you had never gone back..





move forward darling embrace your new life - you deserve it