Husband wants to me have an aborton, need some advice please....?

My husband and I have been married 6 yrs. very happily and have 2 wonderful children together (3yrs. old boy %26amp; 7 mos. old girl). I have been on birth control faithfully since having the second child, but somehow became pregnant with twins. I am now 9 wks. along. My husband is firm that he doesn't want any more children than what we have and wants me to get an abortion or says he is going to divorce and leave me, which I honestly believe he would do. I just don't get it or understand. This was an accident. We can certainly afford to have more,our home is big enough, and I'm ok with having more. When I ask him why he feels the way he does, he justs says that he only wanted 2 and that he is firm in his decision. Since I've told him I'm pregnant and with twins he has been fighting with me,spending a lot of time at his mom's house, and looking for an apartment (so his mom tells me). I don't know what to do. I'm so confused, hurt, and scared. What do you think? What would you do?Husband wants to me have an aborton, need some advice please....?
hi ,sweetheart youre husbandis acting like a right plank ,look im going to be really honest with you here and i do not plan to upset you im just being honest with you ok ? ,he didnt complain about the sexbit and if he was so against having more kids why did he not get the snip that would have made sure that you 2 could not have any more kids ,as for contraception not oone on the market is fool proof you can fall preganent with them so i really do believe you that you did take it as regular as clock work ,this is the hard bit for you and im going to tell you this my x husband did the same thing to me and i went and got the operation done and from that day to this and more than likely for the restof my life i regret that ever getting done i did go on to get preganent after that op was done on the side as i wanted another baby regardless to what he wanted and heres the thing as much as i love that now teenager and she has nearly left school i still regret it now that was 18/19 years ago ,so if you can imagine youre self being able to get over this and put it to the back of youre mind and living youre life as normal ,then ok it is right for you but if for one split second that it will be there as it is for me at christmas what could have been birthdays the date that the operation took place ,then i would think long and hard as it might be the wrong decicion for you as youre the one that is going through with it not youre plank of a husband ,do you think he could go through with it ,ask him ? if he can go through with an operation that would stop he kids from coming into the world ?i really believe that he would be stuck for words ,........and it might waking himup to what he is demanding you to do !!i hope i havent hurt you or upset you ,i just wanted to show you what it is like to be on the other side of that decion to get this operation done ......i wish you all the luck and love in the world what ever you deside to do as remember this body belongs to you and not youre husband and it not his body that it would affect .......take care xxHusband wants to me have an aborton, need some advice please....?
This is the worst scenario I ever heard..I'm so sorry you are in this predicament...





Are you okay raising these kids on your own..if so, have the twins and move forward..





If not, I guess get an abortion...
What a selfish jerk to make you have to make a decision!! You didn't get pregnant by yourself!! Do you want to be married to someone that makes you choose between your children and him?!?!? I can't think of a more horrible position to put your wife in...I am soooo sorry!!





No one can help you to make this type of decision, but I would say, make it with you heart, because once it's made, either way you go, you have to live with it forever. Good luck to you...I hope things work out.
There is NO way I would ever stay with someone who wanted me to kill our child. He shouldn't be in the same house with the other children, either.
send his stupid *** packing take care of your kids file for divorce and child support
abortion is illegal her in the US. That shouldn't be the reason for a divorce. I think he doesn't truely love you as you thought he did. I am sorry this has been happening to you. You shouldn't worry about what he thinks or tell you to kill innocent children whom you are bringing into the world.Please don't kill them, they deserve to live. Keep the children
I think that your husband is being a cad. If he really loves you as he says he does he would have been more supportive. The call is yours and yours only. But I feel that you should go ahead and have the babies. But at the same time prepare yourself to be a single parent and believe in your ability to bring up the 4 kids emotionally and financially.
Its a shame he is willing to go for a divorce over not killing his own children! Let him go since he and his mother is that cheap but not without getting child support ;)





It would be tough for you to raise 4 kids but would you really want to live the rest of your life feeling you killed 2 of your own children? I didn't think so. Take courage and I would personally inspire a woman, a mother like you. Good luck!
Your husband is already gone! Loving husbands and fathers do not create familial crisis, they avert them. Keep the twins, but soon you'll be raising 4 kids on your own. Can you handle it? Do you have support from friends and family?





You are now in my prayers.
Have the babies if you want. It's your body and your husband is not a nice or reasonable if he divorces you over something like this.
The children were conceived out of love. Here there is no accident. Let him stay with his mother. And you have your twins.


Don't be afraid. It sounds like he is. He is not being very nice to you. Nor is his mother. I think you should listen to your belly. They really really want to be born.
That husband of yours sounds like a real winner. Divorce???


What a prick. This ';accident'; was caused by 2 people. You don't need someone so controlling in your life. YOU file for divorce, ask for full custody and the maximum child support. What he's doing is very insensitive....and should not go un-punished.





I know what I just said was harsh, but he's blaming you, and turning HIS back on both of your's responsibility.


A ';flip-side'; option would be to agree to an abortion, only after HE gets a vasectomy...that way, the ';accident'; won't be his fault if it happens again.....I still think he's an insensitive prick.
I don't care how ';happy'; the two of you have been.. You should never choose a man over your children. Your husband is a sorry excuse for a ';father'; and any Mother who would choose to go ahead with an abortion, just to keep their husband happy.. is no better than he is.





Your children should be your top priority, and if that means losing your marriage, so you can be there for ALL your children, then that's something you really need to look into.





Yes it will be hard.. but that doesn't mean it's impossible. You can do it, and don't for one moment let anyone tell you otherwise.





I truly believe that if you decide to abort your babies, you will resent your husband for the rest of your life.. Can you live with knowing that you had two precious babies growing inside you, that you decided to murder, just to keep your husband happy?? And what will you tell your other children? Trust me, they will find out as they get older, what was going on.. and what decision you made. Do NOT choose him over your children!





I think you know what the right thing to do here is.. I know it wouldn't be the easy thing to do, but you need to get away from that creep. If he thinks so little of his children that you are carrying right now, he doesn't deserve to be in the lives of the ones you have now. They deserve a real father.. someone who loves them, and doesn't put himself above their own life.





Please, do not give in to what he is wanting from you. You'll regret it for the rest of your life.
Dont let your husband pressure you into something that you do not wan to do. I am neither for nor against abortion I believe it is a woman's and man's decision to decide whether or not to abort their child. I also believe it is ultimately up to the woman since it is her body that will be going through it. You will have to decide if your marriage is more important to you than having more children. There are other options out there also. Have you spoken to your husband about adoption. There are many wonderful loving couples that would love to have a child that can not. If you and your husband have discussed the amount of children you wanted to have before this pregnancy then my question is this why didn't one of you do something to guarantee that you would not become pregnant. Vasectomy or tubal? If you decide that you are keeping the twins no matter what your husband will still be fiancially responsible for them whether he wants to or not. I think that there may be other issues going on that you need to think about and that this pregnancy was just the icing on the cake. Please make sure you research all of your options before making your decision. Any of the decesions that you make will greatly change your life so make sure that you are 100% comfortable and okay with the decision that you come to. Ultimately it is your choice, your body and you that will have to live with the end result. Good luck to you I know this is not easy but when the right choice presents itself you will know if you are honest with yourself.
Better get it aborted. Instead of going of birth controlling pills go for vasectomy - a permanent solution. I too did the same thing when my first son was on 2 years old we were not in a position to bring up another child. Later I got the second son when my first became 4 years. Now we did the same thing and enjoying sex at its fullest even though my age is 47 and wife is 40.
If you want the twins, think how upset you'd be if you aborted them just to keep your husband? If he threatens to leave you over this, who's to say he won't threaten it again over something else? His mind seems to be made up already that he doesn't want to be a man. More proof is running home to mommys arms. If you don't feel you want to lose these babes, you will NEVER get over it if you go through with it.





Child support.
he has no right to kill life... they maybe a mistake.. but they are gods gifts.. dont give up the babies.. he doesnt know what a mistake he is doing {}
its not his decision its yours. i would find out if i want the two kids or not. do you want to make your husband happy? the thing is, if he really loves you, he wouldnt just divorce and leave you because your pregnant. he'd try and talk to be more understanding then just being too close minded.
So sorry. Making a decision like this is one of the hardest decisions in your life. You need to ask yourself, would you be able to live with the decision if you did? I don't know what your spiritual/religion beliefs are, although you should not feel pressured by him or what other's think, this is an individual choice that you have to make. If you can live with the decision to, or not to, is all that matters. Ask God for guidance. I read a spiritual book that said (even though many believe differently) These little souls will understand your decision, sometimes they come through other family members/friends. If you will always wonder what if? and not forgive yourself, then you should go through with your pregnancy even if it means losing your husband..........or so he says........
You were happily married to this ';man';? Since this guy has shown you what kind of ';man'; he is why do you still want to be with him.





If he will be unhappy with have twins, think about how unhappy he is going to be paying child support on 4 children.
Their human beings they didnt ask to be conceived and just because your husband is jealous of losing more of your attention to more children (yes it really is that simple) doesnt mean they should pay for his selfishness.





He obviously doesnt know he is still responsible for monetary support so tell him he has a choice accept the 4 children and you or go your not killing innocent children for his selfishness.





Its amazing how he's forgotten you didnt make these babies on your own and that even though the birth control failed his sperm helped to create them.





Good luck hun and i really hope you keep them.
Keep the kids. There are programs to help you if he decides he wants a divorce. Also friends and family members would be helpful if you want their help as well.
If there is no medical reason for not having the twins, give birth and enjoy. BUT have your tubes tied when they do the c-section. Tell him if he didn't want more children, he could have gone snip-snip and this wouldn't have happened. It is his fault for not getting fixed. But I wouldn't have any more children if I were you. You will have even numbers and that is great. I believe he will come around sooner or later. If he does file for divorce, get him for abandonment, spousal support, child support for all 4 kids, the house and 50% of his retirement. When he sees the darling babies and weighs that against losing the other 2 and his wife, he should come to his senses.





Don't have an abortion without justifiable medical reasons.
I am so very sorry to hear of your situation. In reading your letter anyone can see how much you love your children. Yes, all four of them! Your husband is a selfish and heartless man. Please have your twins and raise them. They will continue to bless and fulfill your life as you will theirs. It is very natural to feel hurt, confused, and scared. Please seek counseling to help you adjust, be happy, and unafraid of your future. Do not let your husband's threats spoil your life. Instead, prepare yourself for a wonderful life without him. Financially, he is responsible for child-support, your children's health insurance and medical bills, their education (yes, even college). You are blessed that you already own your home outright. Get yourself a good lawyer so that you and your children get a secure financial future. You and your children are in my prayers.
He'll have to pay for child support anyway!